The Deal With Sibling Names

Besides durability and popularity, sibling names are another controversial topic in the naming world. The idea of siblings' names being similar has sparked a lot of debate.

We can expect sisters or brothers born within two years to be named, say, Alice and Clara, Henry and Leo. However, style preferences often change. Hence, many favor "using the name you love" rather than trying to fit in with the siblings. The reasoning is that, according to a Nameberry forum, "they are individual people, not matching Samsonite suitcases" ("Sister for Pearl-Viola, Iris, Astrid or Constance?"). 

Such advice is not surprising for the individualistic culture we live in. Yet, loneliness is higher than it was when American was more collectivistic. I think alienating a child from their family is no help. 

This being said, I believe sibling names need to have something in common. As Laura Wattenberg wrote in the introduction to the 2019 edition of The Baby Name Wizard, giving a third sister a name quite different from her sisters "could send an unintended message that you're setting her apart and have different expectations of her" (17-18). Hence, Alice, Clara, and Sloane may not work together. Neither will Henry, Leo, and Maddox.

However, sibling names do not have to be perfectly matched. Names of different styles can work together for matching sounds and/or syllable counts (i.e. Elowyn and Rosalie, Bennett and Maverick). Plus, seemingly different names can work together for similar naming sources. For example, there can be sisters named Brooklyn and Peoria or brothers named Memphis and Austin, after American cities. 

Plus, names can merely be matched for a similar sense of history or modernity. For instance, Ezra and Carter both have plenty of history, and Ember and Harlow are both contemporary. Besides, loose requirements allow tastes to change, making room for sisters named Lucy and Joy, George and Booker. 

Finally, sibling names that are too "matchy" are as problematic as those that don't match at all. Naming a sister and brother Scott and Scarlett, alongside sisters Cora and Nora or brothers Ryan and Zion, allows one name to be confused for the other. Plus, while sticking to a theme is not bad, naming sisters all gemstone names or names from the same movie can discourage them from traveling unique paths. 

In conclusion, while sibling names do not need to be perfectly matched (and, perhaps, they shouldn't), but alienating a child from the family because of subjective feelings about a different name is not the best idea. Naming, after all, is ought to be about the child more than the parents. Besides, if love is about sacrifice, naming Alice and Clara's sister Rose or Henry and Leo's brother Ezra fits the definition more than naming them Sloane or Maddox would. 

This is not to shame anyone who's been given a name merely from their parents' tastes, nor is this to attack parents who already have done so. I am just giving my honest view on matching sibling names. 

Readers, onto you. What are your views on matching sibling names?

WORKS CITED:

Wattenberg, Laura. The Baby Name Wizard, 2019 Revised 4th Edition. Harmony Books, 2018, pp. 17-18.

"Sister for Pearl-Viola, Iris, Astrid or Constance?" Forums, Nameberry, 2017, https://forum.nameberry.com/t/sister-for-pearl-viola-iris-astrid-or-constance/280007.